Hayzall Nut

Starting a dream journal soon.
If I can remember my dreams.
Which I can’t.
So good luck to me.

 

My Reading Story which everyone wanted to hear:

It was a calm summers morning, as teens around the country filed around to receive their GCSE grades. I got mine and raced towards the town of Reading. Back then Reading was a simple town, wasn’t much going for it apart from the one festivity which out shone all others. Reading Festival. I arrived, much to my regret, at around 10 :30 am, as all festival goers know, the prime entrance time. The queue stretched far and wide, astounding numbers, outranking any possible force on this earth.

Bored.

Okay, so showed up late-ish on thursday, had to find crappy spot for campsite. Friends showed up 2 hours later. First night fine except two tents away you could quite simply hear people having sex with groans at intervals of 0.6 seconds. Exact quote “so how long does it take to go again?”.

Woke up, hoping to go to the toilets, toilet is essentially a pit with seats ontop and when peeing , the cubicle doors are low enough to talk to other people peeing. Went for a shower in the swimming pool, £3 for shower and swim, had to swim in boxers and didn’t bring a towel. Friends brought loads of money, i only had £50, not enough for 4 days ration, limited myself to 1 meal a day and scrounging free milk from tea places, to which a west country man held up a inexplicably sharp knife and ordered me away from. Wellies cut into my calf as the place rained for half a day.

2nd day, friends decide to head to bed, i, energised with a caffeine pill went for what i would like to call a wonder. Walked for 4 hours 1-5 am meeting different strangers, met a group of guys and a girl named flora, we free rapped with some guys on the way to white camp where they called home and almost got kicked out because we found new people that angered staff that flora stole hats off of. Lost half our group, ended up with more strangers who decide to start singing songs with an old as guitar at 5am. Got shouted at by staff more. On way back to my camp, walked by a friend from school with equally tired eyes. we acknowledge each other with nods. no words. we walk on.

I reach my tent and woke the people up,they were not pleased. The day begins with 3 cans of strongbow and what Neffi, who shall remained mysterious as she is possibly a murderer, called a mixture of vodka,gin,rum,white spirit and the devil’s tears. That day was aiite. The final day/night is where the business went down. Being awake for 48 hours and unfed whilst drinking is not a good mix. Whilst running towards the stage to watch my highlight band Panic at The Disco, i release myself on a telephone line next to the main path. I rushed towards the band, start to feel queesy. Vomit, vomit over the horribly trodden ground. A kind girl, possibly in her late teens, approach me and comforts me, she asked “have you got friends you can call?” i grabbed my phone and handed it over to her. My friends scurry to hide my shame and aid me to stumble to the tent, where i observe my other friend who was too incapacitated.

I close my eyes as a fade out from reality. 6 hours later i awake feeling oddly calm and focused. Grabbed flip flops, a caffeine pill and headed out, where i was holted by a friend.”you should lie down” he said, to which i replied “Lets go for a wonder”, having heard my exploits of the last 48 hours, they quickly agree. Along my set path of only turning left, a girl, 5ft 7, brunette with a nose piercing glimmering by, in this moonlight, an easy 6, stumbles on and latchs onto me. Drags me and my friends to her campsite off in the distance. We sat with her and her friends and chatted. Until she began to sit on me, being all touchy feely. The lips moved in. 

In a desperate cry from her friends ” go somewhere else to do that” we took off. Having lost my flip flop singular in the mud, we looked for a clearing, having found a bed of open ground shrouded by bushes and trees, we bumped uglies.

And johnny was not present. To this day, all i know of her was that her name was “Eleanor”. Even as i walked off having picked up my friends who had waited patiently for me, informing that she’d been with at least 8 guys that weekend, i stayed calm and booked my STI testing. Negative for all. And rightly so, as my so called friends are the biggest compulsive liars in this very universe.

There you have it, the real Chris at Reading Story.

The End 

I just bought myself the new Pokemon SoulSilver game; 
A week before my 17th birthday. I know, how sad. How depressing that a teen boy finds solace in a game he has not picked up in 6 years in place of:
Going outside
Do exercise
Write something creative and inspiring.

Nah, lets sit indoors and procrastinate like a bitch. Thanks brain, awful lots of help you are. Seriously though.
Talking about plans, planning plans, planning to plan plans is all I am capable of doing.
I was ill for a week though conscious brain….
Erm, Boo to the Hoo?
Come on, you’re better than this. You got through GCSEs without revision and got 8A*s, you’re showing off via the internet, you sound like a douche, but at least you’re proud about it!
Be proud that you do weird things and that you enjoy doing said weird things; It’s the weird that define us.

Which is pretty much all we do in life. Trying to be above the monotony. The clown fish in the sea of Bass. The Taylor Swift fan at a metal concert.
The fourth finger that doesn’t actually do anything but for some reason you feel it’s important and looks kind of cool. Outstanding.
Which brings me onto my point:
I got addicted to Heroes; The TV show.
I know it’s been cancelled and I can see why: Get rid of Peter Petrelli’s full potential and you’ve lost me.
But the message in the show was clear to me.

Kill People, eat their brains and you’ll get Super Powers?
no, no, not that one

Get your supervillan name from a broken watch and stalk people?
Erm, no no, think more clearly

Be Hot and indestructable?
You can’t just do that, i think. You gotta think a little less Kim Kardashian interpretations and more asian guru sitting on top of mountain handing out advise to worthy champions.

Be      a      Hero
In whichever way you can. The Super has nothing to do with it. It’s all about the mindset; The willing for good over evil. The appreciation for kindness and the striving to be plain awesome.

“The road to awesomeness is paved with heroism”

Just an old bible quote I’ve altered slightly to fit this topic, but the essence is not lost!

I will aim to be a Hero.

Sidenote: Going to write a script, hopefully for a series for Youtube surrounding How people would deal with “abilities” Love to have help and feedback!
And followers…. hint hint hint hint hint hint hint

First post of 2012, hurrah!

It keeps me wondering how I have been able to live long enough to see the major apocalypse day. I can picture myself in 40 years time:

“Back in my day, if you’re girlfriend didn’t live through 19 doomsdays, she’s too young for you son”

And bam, the thing that defined our generation would be ridiculous events and no one will ever give a crap about. Which essentially sums up history if you think about it. I mean, nobody really gives a darn that the Anglo Saxons completely endangered the Celts which dwelled in England? So if we just start not caring now, then the process would be sped up.

EVERYONE should just become desensitized to everything, that way we can really focus on stuff that really matters to us and not get distracted cause some dudes who used to live in central america left out a couple of thousand years on their calendar.
For all we know, it could be a time capsule, and the part that says
“Lol jokes, just kidding, we just CBA’d”
Was simply lost in translation?

But then again, if the world did end :
And we’re looking at the brighter side of things here.
If the world did end, what would be so great about it?
Lets see, erm, no more humans and therefore pollution and everything will get restored to its rightful natural state.
No more pointless sequels to movies that died a hero to its genre.
No more follow up Pokemon games which just ANNOY the crud out of me because now I can’t play them because they keep making the consoles are always changing and the cartridge slot is slightly different!
 
GEEZ Nintendo…..

I love you, I truly do. But start making decent games, not ones that smell of poo.

If it rhymes, it’s gotta be true, and thats all i have to say, what about you?

BTW NEW VIDEO OUT @ HayzallNut ! check it out! 

I am actually doing stuff,

Maybe.

Well you’re all going to have to trust me.

I am currently working on the following:

A short film, about a disaster, in which I had no cameraman; so many a still shots to come:)

Other scripts for more comedic stories and tales

Some original songs, as opposed to unoriginal songs;

And a Pun of the Week sort of thing, if I can manage to find the topics!

I’ll keep all 4 of my followers posted won’t I?
I’ll catch you all later
(Actually, I said that about Pokemon, I lied, no way I can catch 600+ of those things)